By Jayson DeMers
Every leader’s ideal relationship to his or her subordinates requires some measure of likability and respect. A likable leader will get along with subordinates on a personal level, and they’ll be able to enjoy each other’s company, making the workday more enjoyable and boosting morale.
A respectable leader, in addition, will command attention, discipline, and obedience from subordinates, which will lead to a more organized workplace, and a firmer hierarchy in the organization.
The problem is, respectability and likability exist, in some ways, on a spectrum. Taking an action that makes you more likable might lose you some respect. And taking an action that commands respect could make you less likable. So, is it possible to be both liked and respected? And if not, which one is more important?
Respect as a necessity
First, as a leader, understand that respect is a necessity, and it can exist both as a form of compliance and in a freely given form. For example, most employees will follow your commands because they know they might be fired if they don’t; this is respect as a form of compliance.
Another group of employees might admire your leadership style, and personally wish to follow your directives so they can align themselves with that style; this is respect freely given.






I met Tanya years ago, at a global corporation where she led a business unit and enjoyed a reputation as a formidable mentor. “The thing I always keep in mind,” she told me with obvious pride, explaining her approach to management as we walked through a bustling open office, “is that these people are the best talent in the business. They could be working elsewhere, if they so chose. And I am sure that many will, eventually.”![iStock_000008266083Small[1]](https://www.issg.net/wp-content/uploads/iStock_000008266083Small1.jpg)
By Marcel Schwantes