by Gianpiero Petriglieri
There is an old cartoon I often show to the managers I work with. It portrays a smiling executive team around a long table. The chairman is asking, “All in favor?” Everyone’s hand is up. Meanwhile, the cloud hovering above each head contains a dissonant view: “You’ve got to be kidding;” “Heaven forbid;” “Perish the thought.” It never fails to provoke awkward laughter of self-recognition.
I have a name for this cocktail of deference, conformity and passive aggression that chokes people and teams. I call it violent politeness. Continue reading